


Steve's Lover

by Merlin_OhMy



Series: The Untold Stories of Steve Rogers' Life [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Bisexual Steve Rogers, Discovery, Fix-It of Sorts, Flashbacks, Friendship, Gay Bucky Barnes, M/M, Making Up, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Secret Relationship, Steve Rogers Has PTSD, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Tony Stark Feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-16
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2019-02-15 16:12:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13034742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Merlin_OhMy/pseuds/Merlin_OhMy
Summary: Tony discovers long-kept secret one afternoon as he looked through boxes at the Stark Family Estate, his childhood home. Turns out there's a lot he doesn't know about his father nor the man he thought he knew so well. Steve Rogers didn't tell the Avengers everything about his life.Part 1 of a collection of little muses peeking into Steve’s life before and after the war.





	1. Discovery

Tony had no idea what he would find in the dusty boxes in his childhood home. Something had compelled him to go home, to search for answers in the Stark family’s attic. The boxes marked _Rogers_ got his attention almost immediately. Tony recognized his father’s messy scrawl as his heart raced opening the aged cardboard.

Hidden in crisp tissue paper, Tony unearthed a brown wooden box. He found two velvet bags within the beautiful ornate box. A smooth metal compass, two golden rings, and a pair of dog tags within the blue velvet bag.As Tony opened the compass, he finds it miraculously still works. The picture behind the smooth glass caused him to pause. A picture of Bucky Barnes smiling, handsome in uniform, no older than the last time Stark saw the solider. Barnes looked young, unburdened by the tragedy of his life yet to unfold. The words engraved on the outer shell of the compass read, ‘Till the end of the line.’ Tony runs his thumb across the smooth words, the phrase feels like a _promise_ , a **_mantra._**

The dog tags are Steve’s, but Tony is shocked to discover an additional tag on the necklace. Bucky’s name once worn around Steve’s neck with pride.They must have been _lovers_ , a lifetime ago, Tony thinks. Steve and Bucky’s life interwoven not just in life but reflected within their personal effects. A brief window into the life of a man, Stark thought he _knew_ so well.

Unsurprisingly the cardboard box contains other treasures. The most adorable set of black and white photos of the young couple taken in a photo booth. They’re worn as if someone kept the photos tucked within his wallet or uniform pocket. Bucky kissing Steve’s face with adoration painted on their faces. Steve seemed happier than Tony has ever seen him before, young and carefree.

Tony assumes by the contains of the time capsule, these treasures must have belonged to Steve. Judging by the second velvet bag, Bucky’s personal effects are among the collection. Bucky’s bag contains unsmoked cigarettes, worn dog tags, faded playing cards, and a photo of his kid sisters. It makes Tony’s chest ache to consider the fact the Barnes family lost a son, brother, and friend. Steve lost the love of his life.

All this time he hated the Winter Solider, but he didn’t stop to consider the man he had been. Now Tony can’t help but grieve for the time these men lost. Despite the fact they haven’t talked in months, Tony finds himself picking up the phone to make a call. It’s stupid but Tony kept the burner phone Steve gave him. It’s stayed in his jeans pocket since he unboxed it, just in case Steve called. 

 

He can't help but wonder about the story of Steve and Bucky's shared life. Tony would especially like to know the story behind the two golden rings.

 

_Denial Stark, it's not just a river in Egypt._

 

"Dammit, _Stark_. Stop having feelings, you're not supposed to have a heart.", Tony whispered to himself as he listened to the line trying to connect his call.


	2. Interlude

Steve wasn't willing to discuss much over the phone. Though, he seemed receptive to Tony's line of questioning. After a few weeks of cooperative communication between the two men, they decided to meet in person. Tony wasn't surprised by Steve's stonewalling nor his skepticism. Though, Steve has always been a private person, keeping to himself. Cap rarely trust anyone these days, Stark can't say he blames him.

 

**_1:15, Teterboro Airport, Near Long Island, NY_ **

"Rogers."

 

"Stark."

 

The two men hadn't laid eyes on each other in months. It takes a hell of a lot of calm breathing to keep Tony from either hugging the hell out of Rogers or kicking the crap out of him. Stark hasn't quite decided how he feels yet. _Siberia._ Emotions flood Stark's body, sudden flashbacks of memory, damn, why did he think meeting with Steve was a good idea? Right, he's trying to figure out why the fuck everything went south.

 

 _"Tony, breath, dude. I'd hate to forget to breathe and pass out. How embarrassing would that be?.",_ Tony reminds himself, trying to ground himself and mask his nervousness. Naturally, he tries to slip back into the arrogant _Genius billionaire playboy philanthropist persona._ This is a game, not that different from a presentation in the boardroom or addressing the entire investigative joint committee of Congress. All he has to do is do this one more time, how hard can it be?

 

Though Tony can tell by looking at Steve, even though the bravado, the kid is watching his own six. Tony guesses Rogers is packing, not just 200 pounds of super soldier, but a Glock. Interesting choice, he doesn't remember Steve carrying a gun before all of this. Might've been a gift from his boyfriend, damn that's a scary ass thought. Tony frequently underestimates the depth of Rogers' skills as a soldier, he knows how to kill, maybe just as effectively as the Winter Soldier. 

 

Whoah. The genius' brain is kicking into hyper gear as he began over-analyzing the situation and trying to predict all possible endings. Tony laughs mentally, his nerves got the best of him. He forgot Rogers is the greatest tactician ever to walk the earth. Stark doesn't doubt that if Steve wanted to harm him, it would've already happened. Besides the private airfield is too public a place, and Steve isn't going to hurt him.  

 

Steve wouldn't have come all this way if he didn't trust Tony. 

 

Besides, T'Challa is angrily glaring from the airplane. Yeah, of course, Steve isn't stupid enough to come alone. Good, neither did Tony, though he isn't so sure Happy is T'Challa's equal. Whelp, good thing Peper knows he had an executive meeting, though he didn't mention specifics nor Steve. Suddenly, Stark is really glad he brought backup too, the suit. He sure wasn't going to bring just his good looks and genius to a gunfight.

 

Tony noticed the Steve didn't bring the boyfriend, yeah, he has about a  thousand questions running through his head.  _Is Steve a demanding top or a bossy bottom?_ _Enough!!! Stark, focus!_

 

They met halfway, Steve extends his hand for a handshake. Though to both of their surprise, Tony pulled him into a hug. Steve had forgotten how gentle Stark could be, god, when was the last time someone hugged Steve? Slightly embarrassed, Steve could've stayed there a little longer. But thankfully, Cap pulled away at the appropriate moment.

 

Stark takes a moment and gets a good look at Steve.How the hell did he miss the signs? The heavy bags under Steve's eyes, the haunted shell-shocked stare, and worse, the desperation for human contact. The kid is a walking war wound, maybe he always has been. Behind all that patriotism, is a scared hurt kid that can't find his way home again.

 

Rogers isn't the only one who screwed up, Stark played his part in the train wreck that torn their team apart. 

 

 "Where's Robocop?", Tony asks.

 

 

"Ah, Buck, he well, decided he couldn't trust himself. He went back under cryogenic freeze until we could fight a way to remove the programming." 

 

"I'm so sorry, Steve."

 

God, Rogers looks like a sad kicked puppy. Tony's heart cannot take it, it's melting his grumpy Grinch-sized heart. He can't have that. Ugh, he'll have to ask FRIDAY to begin Operation Getting The Boys Back Together.

 

"Me too."

 

"I might be able to help.", Stark admits.

 

"Really? You would help us?"

 

"I will. But I need your help, Steve."

 

"What could you possibly need from me?  


 

"I need to know just how far the Winter Solider Operation goes, maybe we can figure out how they perfected the brainwashing."

 

"And you can find the truth about your dad."

 

"So you and Barnes can finally be at peace, then maybe ol' Howard Stark's ghost will stop keeping me up at night."

 


	3. Breathe

They sat across from each other at a table. Steve watched Tony push the photo forward, he hadn't seen that photo since the day Bucky died. He used to carry it in his uniform pocket, into every battle, every fight carrying a piece of his heart into war. Though the last time he marched into battle without his best guy, Steve had forgotten it. His eyes became wet, Stark studying him from across the worn wooden table.

"You loved him, didn't you?", Tony asked softly, pushing the box of tissues forward.

 

"Bucky is my soulmate, the _oxygen_ in my lungs, the moon and the stars in my universe.", Steve said barely above a whisper, his Brooklyn accent becoming more prominent with each syllable. It's like no other experience Tony can name, Steve doesn't break the stoic persona of Cap. For once in his life, Tony is certain he's meeting Steve Rogers, not the Captain, nor America's Golden Son.

 

But the man, who has lived, lost and loved twice. That scrappy kid from Brooklyn who didn't know when to back down from a fight. Not the righteous Captain, the perfect soldier, but the imperfect man who wore his heart on his sleeve. Steve Rogers, a paradoxical individual, co-existing within two very different contexts until they came violently crashing together.  

 

The Solider with scraped knuckles, calloused hands, and long artist fingers. Hands that created strikingly beautiful displays of art yet were strong enough fight a war. _Oh, Steve."I promise when this is over, I'm going to carry you far away from war. You've fought enough wars for one lifetime."_

"It's quite a love story, Steve. Two men who loved each other in two lifetimes, always finding their way back together to the other."

 

"I _need_ him to be okay.", Steve tried to swallow the lump in his throat. 

 

"I'm going to do everything I can to help you both.", Tony reassured sincerely. 

 

 _"_ Where shall we begin?"

 

"The day James fell from the train", Tony prompted, handing Steve a cloth scrap from Barnes' blue bomber jacket. All it took to prompt Steve's eidetic memory is a few moments of exposure of a trigger: an image, smell, feeling, or an object. 

 

Steve closed his eyes, for a moment he felt himself slip back to that every moment., "I think sometimes, that we were too close, too vulnerable together. Yet I've always considered Barnes to be my greatest strength, my better half, the man who brings out the best in me."

* * *

 

_"Remember when I made you ride the Cyclone at Coney Island?", Bucky chuckled, half scared to death, mostly amused._

 

_"Yeah, and I threw up?", Steve scowled, not really upset by the memory._

 

_"This isn't paid back, is it?"  
_

 

_"Now why would I do that?", Steve joked, sharing an affectionate glance with Barne._

 

_"We were right. Dr. Zola's on the train."Hydra dispatcher gave him permission to open up the throttle. Wherever he's going, they must need him bad.", Jones informed the Howlies after listening to the radio static with Morita,_

 

 

_"Let's get going cause they're moving like the devil." , Monty announced after looking down his binoculars_

 

_"We only got a ten-second window. You miss that window, we're bugs on a windshield.", Cap announced._

 

_"Mind the gap.", Monty advised._

 

_"Better get moving, bugs!", Dugan cackled, half serious, mostly joking._

 

 _Dernier called out, "Go on, now!", in French and Steve begins his down the zip line with Barnes in tow._ _Jones isn't far behind them, though Barnes and Rogers have quite the head start. They land on top of the train, use the ladder to gain access to the train care flawlessly.  Steve is the first to enter the train car with Barnes at his heels, armed with his rifle._

 

_Steve takes lead, gun, and shield in hand. He's caught off guard by the door shutting behind him, separated from  Barnes. A large armed man attacked Rogers with his tesseract powered gun. Steve shot back but it really doesn't matter, he's taken a knife to a gun fight. One wrong move and Steve is vaporized from existence.  Steve ducked and took cover from the radiating blasts._

_In the other car, Barnes is pinned back by fire and tried to return fire from his rifle. He ducked into a corner, as Steve engaged throwing his entire body against the armored agent. The agent is knocked off his feet, Steve hits him a second time with his shield. Bucky slowly moves forward, prepared to return fire. Using his pistole, he returned fire against second enemy soldier._

 

_Rogers advanced, noting Barnes running low on ammo. He busted forward into the room and tossed Barnes his firearm. Steve is running into the car shield up, prepared for another body slam._

 

_"I had him on the ropes."_

 

_  
"I know you did."_

 

_They stopped moving, caught off guard for a millisecond. The armored agent blasts towards them with his laser gun and Steve tried to brace with his shield._

 

_"Get down!"_

 

_The blast vaporized a hole in the side of the car, boys are separated as Barnes stands to return fire. Armed with Cap's shield and firearm, he returns fire until a blast throws him backward. Rogers is quick to go after Barnes, though he's not quite fast enough.  Steve throws his shield at the armored agent effectively knocking him over._

 

 

_"Bucky!", Steve cried stretching his arm out as far as he could. Barnes is holding onto the edge of the train, the bar threatening to give way at any second._

 

_"Hang on! Grab my hand. NO!"_

 

_It all happens in slow motion, Buck falling into the dark abyss as Steve screams, holding desperately on to the edge of the train with great remorse. It's a scene that frequently haunts Steve's sleep in great detail thanks to his perfect memory._

 

 

* * *

Tony has given up on the idea of pressing forward for any more information this evening. Steve is far too emotional after sharing the depth of his memory surrounding the loss of Barnes and the hours to follow. Nor does the genius blame Steve for being so hurt over the tragic loss of his best friend and lover. Steve is emotionally drained and in need of being cared rather than probed for answers. Tony cares far more about Steve's well being than answers at the moment.

Stark relied on Agent Carter's notes to fill in the gaps, as she had recorded noted Steve's mental status, but went as far as interviewing the Howlies. Steve too had to write a report which records the event in great detail. 

Instead, he spends the evening sipping hot chocolate with Steve's head against his shoulder as they watch a harmless Disney movie. Though Frozen isn't on the allowed films list possibly forever, though they might reevaluate at a later date. Steve admits even Moana makes him bawl like a baby, cause Bucky is totally Maui. And Mulan makes him think of his beloved Peg.

Steve reveals his love of all things Disney, which isn't a surprise, Tony thinks given how revolutionary Disney was during Steve's life. Barnes and Rogers had seen Snow White in black and white, having fallen in love with its art form. Tony secretly vows to listen more to Steve and try to get to know him as a person, rather than his Captain. He missed out on truly getting to know Steve all this time.

 Aftercare becomes an important element to their search for answers, as Tony and Steve venture into sensitive parts of their shared life experience.  Their lives as Ironman and Captain America may be just as intertwined as Steve and Bucky's. So much of Tony's life consists of fond memories with Aunt Peg, who loved and spoiled her godson as much as possible. 

Little does Tony yet realize how much of his life depends on Howard Stark and Peggy Carter' memory of two lost soldiers. Peggy built SHIELD after the man she carried in her heart, striving to honor Rogers as she vowed to protect the world in his absence. Howard never gave up, pressing for answers surrounding a ghost story that just kept haunting him. Howard never really got over the loss of Barnes and Rogers, as he built his entire empire to try to continue searching for two lost Brooklyn Boys.

 

Tony smiled sadly at the framed photograph of his father, Auntie Peg, and Jarvis as he listens to Steve's breathing shift. It won't be long now until Steve falls asleep, prompting Stark to cover him up before he departs for his own bedroom. He climbed into bed, trying to still his overactive mind. He needs rest, and so does Steve. 

 

"I _need_ to do right by him, I just have to. He's been through enough, they _both_ have.", Tony thinks to himself,  _we all have._ He tries to summon Peggy's spitfire courage, and Jarvis' saintly patience to guide him through his strange new friendship with Steve.

 


	4. 1991

The timeline becomes very clear as all of the details overlap and provide insight into the hellish nightmare of the Winter Soldier Program.  Despite Zola's arrest for his war crimes, the experimentation on Sargeant Barnes continued under the direction of an overseas Hydra Science Divison. Dr. Johann Fennhoff, perhaps better known as Ivchenko shared a prison cell with Dr. Arnim Zola. Together the men began a plot under the nose of the young Strategic Scientific Reserve division later known as SHIELD. 

 

 **Late February 1945-** Barnes survived the fall from the train and his body is discovered by a division of Russian Hydra affiliates. 

 **Early March 1945** \- Captain Rogers crashed the Valkyrie into the Atlantic Ocean off the coast of Newfoundland.

 **May, 19th, 1945-** Operation Paperclip Begins As The Winter Soldier Program Resumes

 {An ambagious gap of time, with Barnes in cryostasis to prevent the effects of bodily aging. The Winter Soldier is only awoken to carry targeted assassinating threats to Hydra's operation.} 

 **December 16th, 1991-** Barnes carried out a hit ordered to kill the Starks.

Sergeant Barnes was kept imprisoned by a Russian Hydra Divison in cryostasis awaiting further direction from Dr. Zola, and his new partner Inchenko.  It wasn't difficult to continue the experimentation and brainwashing priorly begun by Zola. Under Project Paperclip, 1600 German scientists were recited for employment following the aftermath of World War II. Among them, Zola and Fennhoff who continued to work on the Winter Soldier Project.

Zola aided in the rebuilding process of HYDRA alongside allies including Alexander Pierce, Vasily Karpov and. Dr. Fennhoff. Pierce served as oversight and project leader of the program. Zola continued to strive to perfect the effects of the bastardized Super Solider serum as he continued to direct the continuation of conditioning of the Asset. Fennhoff, a psychiatrist expanded his research into his ability to fully hypnotizing other people. As for Karpov, he oversaw the expansion of the five additional WInter Soldiers, who were deemed too erratic for deployment into the field. 

 

* * *

 

**December 16th, 1991**

"I have a mission for you. Sanction and extract. No witnesses."  
―Vasily Karpov to Winter Soldier

On the night of December 16th, 1991, Howard Stark was with his wife Maria, as he transported vials of revitalized Super Solider serum. SHIELD had begun the process of recreating the serum, after all, Stark might be their last chance at turning the tide for American intelligence.  HYDRA had caught wind of the project and tasked Karpov with the responsibility of preparing the Winter Solider for retrieval.

 

"Please.....help my wife.....help my wife. _Sergeant Barnes_?"

 

The Asset swaggered onto the scene of the crash with deadly calm as he grabbed Howard by the hair.

 

"Sergeant Barnes?

 

"Howard?", Maria called out.

 

The Asset repetitively bashed Howard's head against the car with an emotionless expression painted on his face. Maria Stark's voice grows more concerned, calling out her husband's name multiple times.

 

The Winter Soldier dropped Howard's body before dragging him to the car. Maria gasped in horror as the Asset staged Howard's body within the car. Before moving to the other side of the car, and strangling her until her body went still.  The Asset shot the camera before disappearing from the scene of the crime.

* * *

_"Did you know?"_

 

_"I didn't know it was him." [Steve wasn't aware that The Winter Soldier had been responsible for the  hit until just then.]_

 

_Don't bullshit me, Rogers. DId you know? [That Hydra killed his parents.]_

 

_"Yes." [Steve knew that Hydra carried out an assassination plot against Howard and Maria Stark]_

 

* * *

 

Steve and Tony are both in tears, barely able to stomach look each other in the eyes after this discovery. Both are hard broken, and Tony thinks to himself it's not going to get any easier. Tony thinks his chest might just explode, Steve hasn't said a word since they started this afternoon's session. And the genius so badly wants to know what's on the Captain's mind.

 

"Steve...." 

Just as Tony opened his mouth to continue speaking, Steve darts out of the room and escaped down the hall. He barely makes it to the bathroom before he's on his knees vomiting all the contents of his stomach. Tony presented his ear against the door, Steve's crying, he thinks, poor guy. The door is locked, so he just gives Steve some space as Stark prepares a glass of ginger ale and gathered a warm blanket. 

Tony waited patiently for Steve to come out of the bathroom and gives the guy a big hug. Steve is clinging to him, crying, as his entire body shakes with the force of his sobs. The genius is rubbing his back, and trying to help ground Steve again. He can't stand to think the amount of hurt Steve too feels surrounding this entire nightmare.

 

"I'm _so_ sorry, Tony.", Steve whispered with sincerity as his quaint Brooklyn accent slips through.

 

"It's not your fault, Steve."

 

"Yes, it is.", Steve whispered, "I couldn't reach his hand and he fell."

 

"Rogers, you didn't cause any of this. Hydra did this."

 

"If I had only kept looking for _him_ , then maybe none of this would've happened and you both would've been happy."

 

"You didn't want this. No one did. And the men who are responsible for this hellish program are all dead."

 

Tony coaxed Steve onto the couch to sip some ginger ale and tried to help him calm down. The dark haired man can't imagine the thoughts going through Steve's mind, the amount of guilt he carries on his broad shoulders. Sometimes, Rogers seems to be weighed down by the burden of PTSD, Depression, and Survivor's Guilt, Stark can't believe he almost missed it before it was too late.

 

Tony settled on the couch, staring at the picture of his father, "What the hell, Dad? Recreating the Super Soldier Serum, transporting it during a Holiday with Mom, something about all of this just isn't right.", the genius thinks to himself. 

 

Suddenly everything makes sense, Steve's hesitance about the Accords, while Tony still believes they need oversight, he can understand where Steve's distrust stems from. The Winter Soldier Program spans over seventy years, and almost went under the entire world's radar until everything went to hell.  Two Brooklyn Boys found each other again, and all it took was a simple utterance of _I'm with you til the end of the line_ for all of Hydra's hard work to come unraveled.

 

God, the amount of hurt Steve must feel. Project Rebirth giving him a strong healthy body allowing him to serve his country, for his sacrifice in the heat of battle to mean nothing. It would cost Steve this life, and the people he cared for the most would grow old without him. Barnes would lose everything: his name, identity, arm, autonomy, and freedom.

 

As much as Tony wants to hate Barnes, he can't find it in his soul to feel angry towards the man. Hydra used him like a puppet, a _marionette,_ a trained weapon in the hands of the true evil masterminds. Blaming Barnes for the murder of his parents is like blaming a gun instead of its user for shooting-related deaths. Barnes is just as much a victim as his parents, ensnared by Hydra's evil tentacles. 

 

The people responsible for this tragedy are all dead, and anyone who might've known what was going on is gone. The only person left with any connections to the Winter Soldier Program is Barnes who didn't choose to endure captivity, imprisoned and torture.  Justice won't be served with vengeance, rather with redemption as the genius vows to help Rogers and Barnes finally find peace in the aftermath of their chaotic lives. Those boys have experience too much angst and heartache for one lifetime, let alone two.

 

 


	5. Conclusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I know you loved him.... I loved him, too. But this won't bring him back. Howard, you are the one person on this earth who believes in me. I cannot lose you. Steve is gone. We have to move on... All of us. As impossible as that may sound... We have to let him go."  
> ―Peggy Carter to Howard Stark

The last few days haven't been easy for Steve, and Tony couldn't help but notice the changes in Cap's demeanor.  Rogers became much quieter, keeping to himself spending countless hours in the gym or sketching. Most of Steve's sketches are sentimental, drawings of Howard, Peggy, the Howlies, and Bucky. It appeared the most recent tests run on Barnes weren't yielding positive results as they had hoped.

 

When out of the cryogenic freeze for longer than 48 hours, Barnes has debilitating migraines and epileptic episodes. His condition is currently best managed by remaining in the cryo chamber until T'Chall's staff can find a way to stabilize Barnes' health. No attempts at removing the programming have been viable at this time due to the instability of Barnes' lucidity and health. Though, T'Challa was more than happy to share their current progress with Stark who had an idea about how to help Buck using B.A.R.F followed by intense therapeutic treatment and rehabilitation.

 

When Tony mentioned the idea to Steve, Rogers' eyes had a spark of life back in them. He felt so helpless, struggling to find any way to help Barnes in his current condition. The idea that Tony might have a solution and Steve could help aided in turning his funk around. The day has been spent reading through case files and information to help Barnes' rehabilitation process.

 

Reading into the depth of Barnes' traumatic events became too much for Steve's well being and mental health so Stark proposed a solution. He would upload the files to FRIDAY and digitally catalog information which can be grouped or retrieved using keywords. As Stark worked in the lab, scanning files he invited Steve to sit with him in the lab. The genius works on file management and catching up on Barnes' recent medical reports. 

 

It surprised Tony to watch Steve sketch looking between the paper and at the genius.

 

"Are you sketching me?", Tony asked in awe, Steve was so focused on his art. It reminded the genius of how himself of how he must look when he's in the lab working in deep concentration. 

 

 

"Yes.Aren't you supposed to be reading case files?"

 

 

"Yes, don't change the subject, Cap. I can _multi-task!_." 

 

 

"The last time you "multi-tasked" you built an army of Roomba bots and reprogrammed your ironman suit to wash dishes."

 

Tony can't deny it, it actually happened and was a total disaster. Alright, being a genius can be rough. Not all of his ideas are great, nor work as well as he dreamed. But you have to have a few totally stupid ideas to stumble onto brilliance. It's just not fair, Steve coming up with a chore chart.  Tony shudders internally at the thought of doing chores.

 

 

"Can I see your drawing?"

 

 

"Not yet, when I finish."

 

 

"You're no fun."

 

 

Steve paused momentarily, rolling his eyes at the dark haired man, and Tony pretended to look hurt.

 

Tony continued to work well throughout the afternoon barely stopping to read the files, more focused on scanning them. He wrote an algorithm to log and tag each of the entries.  But one caught his eyes seeing the name Dr. Fennhoff, Stark, Jarvis, and Carter all within the same subject line. It's an original SSR file from 1947, it stands out to him and caused him to pause. Stark continued to scan through the detailed report.

 

* * *

 

_Top Secret_

_May Contain Sensitive Information_

_Agent Margaret Carter_

_May 1946_

_Subject: Levithan, Howard Stark, Dr. Fennoff, Massacre at the Cinema Theater, Item 17_

 

_As Agents Sousa, Jackson and myself began to investigate the Massacre at the Cinema Theater, we soon discovered a larger sub-plot of an attack against the SSR. Agent Sousa found a canister of gas which he accidentally inhaled.  The side effects of the gas provoked Sousa to attack Agent Jackson and myself, until he was later subdued and fell unconsciousness. When Sousa awoke, he was totally unaware of his actions._

_It is my conclusion that the gas caused an induced psychological state which caused the unfortunate loss of life at the theater. 47 people inhaled the gas, became increasingly aggressive and promptly killed each other. It is safe to deduce the massacre was just a test to see if the biological weapon was successfully, and it most certainly had deadly effects._

 

_Mr. Howard Stark came forward about gas which we now know as 'Midnight oil'. The gas was designed by Stark as an effort to keep Allied Force soldiers alert for days at a time. Though it was not successful, side effects included similar to sleep deprivation, anger, hallucinations, psychosis. Midnight oil was not intended a biological weapon, and Mr. Stark properly labeled the gas as  one of his most dangerous inventions._

 

 _Stark revealed to our agency the origins of Item 17, one of the stolen inventions sold on the black market related to the larger plot of an attack against the United States. During the Second World War, General John McGinnis raided the laboratory of Howard Stark and took all of his designs. McGinnis_  used the gas on the Russian army to motivate them to attack the Germans and take Finow. However the weapon made them go into a murderous rage and they started to kill each other. 

 _Doctor Ivchenko, posing as a former prisoner of Leviathan, hypnotized Chief Roger Dooley to retrieve the_ gas, _and ordered him to wear the Stark Heat Vest to provide a distraction while he escaped from the New York Bell Company Office. Dottie Underwood picked up Ivchenko, who informed her that they needed to test the effectiveness of the weapon before using it. Underwood released the gas from one of its canisters inside a movie theater, locking the patrons inside, and they started to brutally attack and kill each other._

_I questioned the motives of Dr. Fennhoff, as Mr.Stark reveals what happened at the Battle of Finow. It is decided that he will be bait to make the doctor appear. Things do not go as planned as Stark is kidnapped by a police officer under Fennhoff's thrall. Dr.Fennhoff has decided that victory over Stark is not killing him for his brother's death; victory is to have Stark deploy the Midnight Oil over Times Square and watch as the city is destroyed._

 

 _After they captured him, Ivchenko explained to Stark how the military used his weapon on the Russians during the war intending to motivate them. However, the weapon made them slaughter each other with their bare hands. Wearing a gas mask, Ivchenko was forced to watch his comrades, including his brother, killing each other._ _Ivchenko then hypnotized Stark to make him believe he would go to Steve Rogers, while in fact he would be spreading the Midnight Oil and killing thousands of people. Using a radio, Ivchenko kept in touch with Stark as he guided him._

 

_I was able to use the radio and managed to make Mr. Stark snap out of the trance and convinced him to fly back carrying the Midnight Oil_

 

* * *

 

A recording Stark finds among the files and plays it back. He's shocked upon what he discovers, well he and Steve both are. It's raw for Steve to hear the tones of grief and loss in the voices of people he loved so dearly.

_"Howard, turn the plane around. Come back and we'll talk about it."_

 

_"I can't do that, Peg. I'm done talking."_

 

_"W-wait..."_

_[Jarvis to Carter], "Miss, Carter I have Mr. Stark's plane in my sight. We are one mile from land. Should I take the shot? Miss Carter... Miss Carter, please, answer me. Miss can I take the shot?"_

 

_"No, Mr. Jarvis. Do not take the shot. I need more time."_

 

 

 _"We don't have more time."_  


 

_"Howard, listen to me. Steve is gone. He died over a year ago."_

 

_"There's something up ahead. It's him....I can fix this."_

 

 

_"You don't have to fix anything"_

 

_"Peg, all I've done my whole life is create destruction. Project Rebirth was.....he was.....the one thing I've done that brought good into this world."_

_"Howard, I know you loved him.... I loved him, too. But this won't bring him back. Howard, you are the one person on this earth who believes in me. I cannot lose you. Steve is gone. We have to move on... All of us. As impossible as that may sound... We have to let him go."_

 

 

_"Peg? He was good before I ahold of him. Huh?"_

 

_"Yes, yes yes!  He was. Where are you?"_

 

_"Evidently flying a plane to Manhattan. I guess you can explain that to me once I land."_

 

_"Mr. Jarvis, he's alright. Stand down."_

 

_"Thank goodness."Tell Mr. Stark to follow me back. I'll bring him home."_

* * *

 

 

"This is it, Steve. Ground Zero for the Red Room, Hydra's rebirth, and the Winter Soldier Program."

 

"I think its safe to assume Dr. Fenhoff and Zola continued to work together."

 

"Levithian is the beginning. And the SSR thought they dismantled all threats, totally unaware of what true evil awaited them."

 

"Tony, I can't imagine they had any idea. I mean I didn't know about Hydra or Project Insight until it all went to shit."

 

Tony sighed, "Do you think Dad knew what his research would cause?"

 

"I don't know, Tones. The Super Soldier Serum is the front-runner of the Cold War. Everyone is trying to reproduce the serum, naturally, I don't find it difficult to believe Stark and/or Shield tried to reproduce it. It sounds like our enemies abroad were certainly  trying to."

 

"But Dad promised Aunt Carter no more experimentation related to the serum in the 1940s." 

 

"Yeah, but by the 1990s, he's produced a serum which Hydra killed him for and used to create five additional Winter soldiers." 

 

"The serum didn't work. The assets were unstable, and kept in cryofreeze." 

 

"Tony, there were two vials of my blood. One in the possession of the government and another with your father. According to Carter's notes, she got rehid of the blood in Howard's possession and poured it into the river in Brooklyn for closure since she couldn't bury me. It gave her a sense of peace knowing they wouldn't try to recreate the serum."

 

"Do you think Dad was on to Hydra? Maybe used the serum as bait, and it all went wrong."

 

"I don't know. It wouldn't say it was a stretch for Howard to become skeptical and use himself as bait. He most certainly was bait for Fennhoff. But to take such a public risk with your mother present. It seems weird, uncalculated, messy."

 

"I have no paper trail to suggest he was investigating or even aware of Hydra's presence within Shield.", Tony sighed.

 

"We may never know the full truth, Tony. But one thing is for certain, some of the details surrounding your parents' death doesn't add up."

 

"At least one thing is for certain, my daddy issues just got ten times worse."

 

"And why is that?"

 

"We're both suckers for all American apple pie Steve Rogers who looks good enough to eat."

 

"I hate you both.", Steve groaned.

 

"No, you love me. And you better love me more than you loved Dad."

 

Steve rolled his eyes, "I am not going there with you."

 

Tony softened sharing a smile with Steve before stealing Steve's sketchbook and stuck his tongue out at Steve. His heart almost stopped seeing the affectionate way Steve chose to draw him. The twink of mischief in Tony's eye, the determination set in his jaw, and the little details captured on paper it felt so right. Tony couldn't believe how Steve saw him as the vulnerability seeps in as his cheeks redden.

 

"Is this how you truly see me?', Tony asked quietly.

 

 

"Yes, Tony. You're smart, brilliant even, and when you're focused your brilliance shines. I never doubt how incredibly smart and kind you are. Even though you know exactly what buttons to push and literally drive me insane at times."

 

 

"Aww, big guy."

 

 

"An artist always sees the truth, pal."

 

 

"Can I have this?"

 

"Of course. I'll have it framed."

 

 

Tony smiled softly, "Thanks, Steve."

 

 

"It helps sometimes to sketch, I actually don't dwell on the weight of the world when I'm sketching."

 

 

"I can understand the feeling. I feel that way about inventing." 

 

 

"Is that why you spend so much time in the lab?"  


 

"I just want to protect my team. You're my family, Steve."

 

 

"Tony, you excel at that, _well_ , when we're not fighting each other I guess."

 

 

"I thought I would be responsible for your death." 

 

 

"Tony, you would never...."

 

 

"But I could've. It's what's driven all my decisions since Ultron. To keep you safe, I took extraordinary measures. I saw you dead and it was my fault."  


 

 

"Tony, our minds were manipulated."

 

 

"But it felt  fucking scary ."

 

 

"I don't believe you would kill me."

 

 

"I could've in Siberia."

 

 

"You're right. But you're not a killer. You were provoked by strong emotions. You were not yourself." 

 

 

" I couldn't fix this, hell, I helped cause this."

 

 

 I believe if anyone can help Bucky, it's you."

 

 

"Why do you even trust me after all of this?"

 

 

"Because if I know you, it's I believe you want to help do good. You are good,  you're my friend, and you're incredibly smart."

 

 

"I'm going to fix this, Steve."

 

 

"The thing is you don't have to fix this."

 

 

"It's what I do, Steve. I fix things, and I'm going to bring Barnes home."

 

 

Like father, like Son, somethings never change.

 

Until next time. This story will continue in the next installation of _The Untold Stories of Steve Rogers' life._

**Author's Note:**

> Would you like to see more of this little muse continued? Leave a comment down below if you do.


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